Currently reading OUR msn history conversations, crying to every word.
i miss him, yes i do, alot. & i can't stop the crying, why can't i? because im a loner.
Monday morning, i thought it was all good, i'd be in school & just see him as usual. Everything would've been fine, until i saw that so-happy smile on his face, well yeah, i was happy for him to be happier without me, but i felt a slight cut through my heart. A slight cut could take a life. I made the biggest mistake ever, despite his flaws he's the only guy i've ever loved until it hurt this much. Don't mean to sound corny but i still love him like shit. Argh , it's so frustrating, i see him in school and yet i can't even go to him & sit with him or just talk. Seriously, i miss those memories & i still keep those love letters & messages. Everything. I still wear the necklace you gave me & sigh, i'm speechless. I end up in tears EVERYNIGHT. Argh, it's my fault i know it is. I told you everything yesterday & it's not enough because i can't explain to what i've done. I don't know, you can be mad at me all you want, you can be ignoring me all you want. I won't disturb you anymore, sigh. I still need you tho, like by my side, every second. I thought you said no matter what you'd be by my side. & i still have the message. But i know since were not together you think i don't think about it anymore. I do, i do, every single second. I can't help seeing you & know that you're no longer my boyfriend. Gah, i'm so attatched to you & i cnt let go, but why? sigh i don't know all i know is i've never been this hurt. Gawd it sucks, i miss you yes i do. Haih, I really need you, you know that? I don't wanna go on crying everyday & everynight. Sleeping after 3am & feeling so suicidal, BUT I'M NOT so please readers, dnt worry -.-"
I don't know how to let you know how much i love you. I don't think i should tell you anything anymore, maybe it would hurt you more i'm glad you seem happy w/o me just so you know i'm dying without you but if you're happy then i'd get over you, i'll try, if i can't well then it's just fate. Whats meant to be is meant to be. I love you so much & it hurts to say. haih.
I miss calling you bibi & hearing your voice, omg. Reading your messages, i still keep it. Those when were still together. Gah. It hurts it hurts. I don't know if you're hurt or not if you don't tell me. Can't you just let me listen? Gah. I feel like dying, seriously life sucks so much w/o you. WHY?! Everything i still remember every moment every second every day week month. I appreciated every single second with you i beared with your sensitivity. I'm emotionally dead right now. Fuck i hate myself so much -.-" I shouldn't have sent that last message to you on Sunday around 3pm. I shouldn't have i shouldn't have, i fucking regret. I needed time but why did i go str8 to breakup. Argh i regret the shit out of this. You think that i lied about EVERYTHING i said yesterday? Oh My God, all those words made me cry like HELL and you telling me that i lied? You don't know how hurtful it is for me to hear that, i cried like hell while typing those messages. And all you replied was "Haih" or you'd just reply me like so cold. Sigh, i feel like dying i just wanna cut school tomorrow -.- But i know i can't haih. I NEED YOU SO MUCHHHH,
i miss him, yes i do, alot. & i can't stop the crying, why can't i? because im a loner.
Monday morning, i thought it was all good, i'd be in school & just see him as usual. Everything would've been fine, until i saw that so-happy smile on his face, well yeah, i was happy for him to be happier without me, but i felt a slight cut through my heart. A slight cut could take a life. I made the biggest mistake ever, despite his flaws he's the only guy i've ever loved until it hurt this much. Don't mean to sound corny but i still love him like shit. Argh , it's so frustrating, i see him in school and yet i can't even go to him & sit with him or just talk. Seriously, i miss those memories & i still keep those love letters & messages. Everything. I still wear the necklace you gave me & sigh, i'm speechless. I end up in tears EVERYNIGHT. Argh, it's my fault i know it is. I told you everything yesterday & it's not enough because i can't explain to what i've done. I don't know, you can be mad at me all you want, you can be ignoring me all you want. I won't disturb you anymore, sigh. I still need you tho, like by my side, every second. I thought you said no matter what you'd be by my side. & i still have the message. But i know since were not together you think i don't think about it anymore. I do, i do, every single second. I can't help seeing you & know that you're no longer my boyfriend. Gah, i'm so attatched to you & i cnt let go, but why? sigh i don't know all i know is i've never been this hurt. Gawd it sucks, i miss you yes i do. Haih, I really need you, you know that? I don't wanna go on crying everyday & everynight. Sleeping after 3am & feeling so suicidal, BUT I'M NOT so please readers, dnt worry -.-"
I don't know how to let you know how much i love you. I don't think i should tell you anything anymore, maybe it would hurt you more i'm glad you seem happy w/o me just so you know i'm dying without you but if you're happy then i'd get over you, i'll try, if i can't well then it's just fate. Whats meant to be is meant to be. I love you so much & it hurts to say. haih.
I miss calling you bibi & hearing your voice, omg. Reading your messages, i still keep it. Those when were still together. Gah. It hurts it hurts. I don't know if you're hurt or not if you don't tell me. Can't you just let me listen? Gah. I feel like dying, seriously life sucks so much w/o you. WHY?! Everything i still remember every moment every second every day week month. I appreciated every single second with you i beared with your sensitivity. I'm emotionally dead right now. Fuck i hate myself so much -.-" I shouldn't have sent that last message to you on Sunday around 3pm. I shouldn't have i shouldn't have, i fucking regret. I needed time but why did i go str8 to breakup. Argh i regret the shit out of this. You think that i lied about EVERYTHING i said yesterday? Oh My God, all those words made me cry like HELL and you telling me that i lied? You don't know how hurtful it is for me to hear that, i cried like hell while typing those messages. And all you replied was "Haih" or you'd just reply me like so cold. Sigh, i feel like dying i just wanna cut school tomorrow -.- But i know i can't haih. I NEED YOU SO MUCHHHH,
I miss you like hell & i'm never getting over you.
This.Is.So.Frustrating.
I.Need.You.So.Much.<3.>
This.Is.So.Frustrating.
I.Need.You.So.Much.<3.>
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